11/30 Impact Wrestling Rresults – IPWF Throwback Throwdown – Impact Wrestling turns back the clock once again with a special edition focusing on their alternate 1980s universe: the Impact Provincial Wrestling Federation. The Canadian-based IPWF features Impact talents under alter egos.
IPWF opened with Giuseppe Scovelli, Jr. (Josh Matthews) and Ignatius Quigley (Alex Shelley) on commentary, as they ran down the show.
Rapid Delivery Pete (Rich Swann) defeated Kamikaze
They pretty much worked this exactly like an 80s match, which I am sure if it
The fans chanted “We want Pizza” at Pete, who presumably brought the three boxes of pizza to ringside because he was in between deliveries as he came down to the ring. Kamikaze attacked Pete from behind to get the heat. Pete hit an armbar and then a bodyslam, but Kamikaze rolled to the apron to escape.
Kamikaze locked on an abdominal stretch and then grabbed the ropes a few times for the heat. The referee caught him on the last one, and Pete was able to hip toss out of it. Kamikaze did a nerve hold on Pete, who fought out as the fans clapped, but Kamikaze locked on a sleeper hold. Pete got his hands up before the third drop, and the fans chanted “Pizza!” because they wanted free pizza from Pete. Pete fought out and hit a running splash for the win.
–A hype video aired for Boris Alexiev (Santino Marella), talking about how he killed Muscles McGee, and he threatened to kill Tim Burr (Josh Alexander).
–George the Iceman brought out DJ 2Large (Moose) for an interview. He was dancing his way to the interview set, so it appears we have seen Dancing Moose again. DJ said that he was happy because he defended his gold, the International Commonwealth Television Championship. He welcomed all challengers, and the 361,000 Man was aiming to take the title, but he promised to squeeze the soul out of him.
The 361k Man (R.D. Evans) came out and said that everyone had a dollar amount, but he was renamed the 369k man now, because of some investments. He offered to buy the title from DJ 2Large. DJ refused. DJ rapped his answer. This segment was terrible, but Moose was funny as he danced. 369k Man introduced his new talent who attacked DJ called The Masked Brother. DJ said he was going to beat up The Masked Brother later.
–Walter Chestnut (David Penzer) was backstage with Neptune (Shera), his client, hoping to terrorize the IPWF as Giuseppe Scovilli Sr. put them out of business. Neptune was going to face Frank the Butcher later.
–Giuseppe Scovilli Sr. (Scott D’Amore) said that Frank the Butcher (Rhino) was going to beat Neptune and leave them without a job.
–Red Letter (Jody Threat) was with George the Iceman and she said she might as well be Rapid Delivery Red Letter for how fast she was going to beat her opponents, and Rapid Delivery Pete walked up and claimed he was the only Rapid Delivery around. Iceman and Letter did not recognize him.
Frank the Butcher (w/ Giuseppe Scovilli Sr.) defeated Neptune (w/ Walter Chestnut)
Rhino actually hit a really nice clothesline in this match to win. That’s about all I can say.
Butcher and Neptune brawled around ringside at the opening of the match, and Neptune got the heat after shoving Butcher into the ring post. The Butcher hit a back elbow, a chop to the head, and a nice clothesline for the win.
–Giuseppe Scovilli then made Chestnut and Neptune janitors for the company.
The Sunday Morning Express (The Editor in Chief (Chris Sabin) & The Paper Boy (Jack Price)) defeated The Hard Workers (Otis Oates (Deaner) & Harry Hall (Jake Something)
Deaner was utterly ridiculous in this, and the bright spot of the show thus far. Oates did the classic spot with the Editor where he fed Editor’s arm to Paper Boy, who wasn’t looking, and ended up doing several arm breakers on his own partner. The Sunday Morning Express put Oates in an adominal stretch and made Oates read their paper. The Editor went to the top rope, but it was a bit too high, so he went down to the second, but caught the foot Oates put up and missed an elbow. The Paper Boy got a cheap shot on Hall and the Editor got the pinfall with a roll up.
–I refuse to recap the segment that followed which involved a wrestler vomiting on another wrestler in response to a prank.
Colt McCoy (Eddie Edwards) & Georgia Cobb (Jordynne Grace) defeated Rusty Iron (Gia Miller) and Rip Razor (Ace Austin)
There is really not a lot to say about this match, other than I’m not used to seeing Gia Miller wrestle. Iron hit a low blow on McCoy when Razor got the attention of the referee, and Iron did her best impression of Luna Vachon. Rip Razor, smoking in the ring, beat on McCoy, but missed a corner charge letting McCoy roll him up for a two. Cobb tagged in and hit a Vader bomb on Iron for a two count. Razor pulled a knife on the referee, but ate a forearm from Cobb, which let him get hit with a cutter. Cobb then hit an airplane spin on Iron for the win.
The Masked Brother (w/ the 369k Man (R.D. Evans)) defeated DJ 2Large (Moose) to win the International Commonwealth TV Championship
The Masked Brother had several weapons concealed in his gear, and 2Large forced him to dance with a full nelson. The referee caught the 369k Man putting the feet on the roes and ejected him. Brother locked on a chin lock, but before he passed out, 2Large started dancing to break out, and danced up and hit a big boot but missed a leg drop and The Masked Brother hit an elbow for 2.
The referee went down with a missed knee strike by The Masked Brother, causing the clothesline from 2Large not to work for the pinfall. The Masked Brother fell to the floor after an atomic drop, and Chestnut and Neptune came out cleaning the floor and distracted the referee, letting two masked men come in as henchmen but DJ took them out. DJ missed a clothesline and The Masked Brother hit DJ with a cellphone to get the win.
–Tim Burr (Josh Alexander) cut a promo on Boris saying that the Fall Maul tournament got out of hand, as Muscles McGee was murdered by Alexiev). The Walking Lumber said he would not go down so easily, and he was going to beat Alexiev.
Tim Burr (Josh Alexander) defeated Boris Alexiev (Santino Marella) (w/ Col. Corn (Johnny Bravo)
Alexiev basically worked as Santino in the early part of the match, unable to shove Tim Burr or hurt him with chops. Burr dropped him with a chop, and then dropped him again with several. Burr hit two overhead chops in the corner, and Burr chopped both his legs before hitting a chop block. Very chop based offence from the lumberjack here. Burr went to the top rope and Corn pulled Burr of the top rope.
Alexiev missed with the Iron Claw, and accidentally grabbed the top rope and he couldn’t let go because of a neurological defect that makes it difficult for him to let go of the hold. Burr hit the ropes when Alexiev was on the top rope, causing him to crash to the mat. Burr continued to chop, something The Chop and Roll Express would be proud off, including a chop as Alexiev came off the top rope.
Alexiev ended up locking a crossface on Burr, but Burr made the ropes. Burr dodged a claw attempt, and Alexiev accidentally put it on Corn, who went into convulsions. Burr then hit a chop off the top rope for the pinfall.
(H/T to Wrestling Observer)
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11/30 Impact Wrestling Rresults – IPWF Throwback Throwdown
