Thursday, April 19, 2018

Impact Wrestling Results - April 19, 2018

Impact Wrestling Results - April 19, 2018
We start with footage of the events of Wrestlecon, including an announcement that Alberto El Ptaron no-showed and was subsequently fired, and that the new main event of Redemption would be a rematch of the Aries-Pentagon-Fenix match that headlined the Twitch show.

Braxton Sutter comes out to introduce his new friend for our opening match...

Su Yung & Braxton Sutter vs Kiera Hogan & Fallah Bahh

Braxton & Su get the jump on their opponents before the bell, but Hogan and Bahh catch them with stereo crossbody blocks.  Bahh with a belly-to-belly suplex and the steamroller, then he tags in Hogan for a flying bodypress on Su for 2.  Su quickly tags out to Braxton, who quickly finds himself on the receiving end of a beating from both opponents.  He dodges a vertical drop from Bahh, thenSu tags in and drills Bahh in the face with a basement dropkick and then chokes him with her boot.  Braxton dumps Bahh to the floor, and Su takes him out with a rolling senton off the apron.  Hogan tags in, and catches a few near falls on Su.  Hogan with a butterfly suplex, then slaps the taste out of Braxton's mouth, then Su cracks Bahh over the back with a kendo stick, but Bahh no-sells.  Sutter dumps Bahh to the floor, Hogan gives Sutter a tornado DDT, Su hits a palm thrust and hits the cradle shock driver for the win.

Winners: Braxton Sutter & Su Yung

Good opener, though the pairing between Su and Sutter is a bit weird.  Allie comes out and attacks Su, and a bunch of referees and Sutter have to break them up.

We're off to the LAX clubhouse where they talk about preparing for the Big Bad Booty Daddy.  Konnan says they were in the NWO together and he knows all about him, and Eli thinks he's gonna help him, but he could be a hindrance because you never know what he's going to do.  He's a wildcard, but they're the champs, and he's going to find out his time has come and gone.

Off to the control center where Josh and Sonjay talk about stuff.

McKenzie is backstage with Kongo Kong and Jimmy Jacobs, who tells McKenzie that she's pretty and asks how it feels to be pretty, and how it feels to be handed things their whole life because of the way they look.  That's what Johnny Impact is, and people like him have never been outside that bubble, but that changes tonight because his monster is going to pull him out of that bubble, mess up his good looks, and when Impact looks in the mirror after tonight, he won't see the Reflection of Perfection, he'll see a monster staring back at him.

Video package of oVe saying the old Impact Wrestling is gone, and long live the icons of the new Impact.  It's not about wins and losses with them, and Eddie Edwards found that out the hard way when he hit him in the face with a baseball bat.  He doesn't feel a bit bad about what he did, and he regrets nothing.  We go to Eddie, who says that Sami tried to end his career, take out his eye, and stalked his wife, but the bottom line is that he's not going to stop until he ends Sami.  Moose and Tommy Dreamer both got involved last week, setting up a six man tag at Redemption.

The Global Wrestling Network takes us back to Kurt Angle vs Bobby Roode for the TNA World Title at Bound For Glory 2011.  We must have had a lot of Alberto footage to cut out, because we get about the last 10-12 minutes of the match.

KM comes out to the ring and says that a lot of people know him as one thing, and every single one of us are correct: he is an innovator.  Today, he's going to innovate a one of a kind match that nobody has ever heard of before: the KM Open Challenge.  He'll call out anyone, but not just anyone because he doesn't want the Mooses or Fallah Bahhs, he wants the greatest this business has to offer like Duane Gill, Barry Horowitz, D-Ray 3000, Bilvis Wesley, or the one and only Musketeer.  He calls out anyone who wants to answer the challenge, because he'll make history for them.  Out comes...Brian Cage.  Somehow, I don't think this is what KM had in mind.  He starts backpedaling and says he wasn't talking about Cage per se because they're boys.  KM goes for a fist bump, and says Cage can go back to Gold's Gym, and he's going to go do some stuff a different way.  KM tries to leave, but Cage drags him back in to jump start...

KM vs Brian Cage

Cage with a back suplex and a diving dropkick.  Cage with machine gun clotheslines in the corner, followed by a charging elbow, leaping enziguiri, and a big release German suplex.  Cage goes to the second rope and suplexes KM into the ring.  That was impressive!  Cage off the top with a picture perfect elbow, followed by a roaring clothesline and an F5 for the win.

Winner: Brian Cage

BRIAN CAGE IS A MACHINE!  The power it takes to haul someone KM's size into the ring with that suplex is ridiculous.  This guy is unbelievably awesome.

Johnny Impact is backstage, and he's...DOING HANDSTANDS!  He'll face Kongo Kong...TONIGHT!

Video package of Jimmy Jacobs putting Kongo Kong over and talking about their history, He imagines what Kong is going to do to Johnny Impact, and how Kong's actions will do his talking for him.

Kongo Kong vs Johnny Impact

Impact improbably goes for a test of strength, but it was a ruse...a cunning attempt to trick Kong!  It didn't help, because Kong just tosses him over the top rope by the throat.  Impact comes in and unloads a flurry of strikes, but Kong no-sells and runs Impact over with a shoulderblock before standing on his back.  Kong with an avalanche in the corner and a belly-to-belly suplex that launches Impact across the ring.  Kong with a rolling senton for 2.  Impact dodges a legdrop and hits a running kneestrike, then mounts Kong and hammers him with forearms.  Kong shoves him off, so Impact hits a standing shooting star press for 2.  Kong lays Impact out flat with a headbutt, gouges at his face, Impact starts firing back again, uses his speed to outmaneuver Kong, and drills him with a leaping enziguiri.  Impact tries a springboard something, Kong catches and tosses him, Impact lands on his feet, but Kong nearly breaks him in half over the top rope with a charging clothesline.  Impact tumbles to the floor, so Kong goes after him and tosses him at the steps, but Impact jumps over the steps and comes down on his feet.  He springboards off the steps, but Kong just swats him out of midair and crushes him against the steps with a rolling senton.  Kong and Jacobs pull the steps out, and Kong tosses the ref into the barricade when he tries to stop them.  They put the steps up on the ring apron and Jacobs holds them there while Kong grabs Impact and rams him face first into the steps.  Jacobs picks up Impact, who appears to have legit broken his nose on that due to the gusher of blood running down his face.  Kong's music hits, so let's call this...


Great brawl, they're doing a great job rebuilding Kong.

We see Johnny Impact being attended to backstage by the trainers, then a video package of the Allie-Su Yung and Matt Sydal-Petey Williams feuds leading into their respective matches this Sunday at Redemption.

Video package of what led into the LAX vs Eli Drake/Scott Steiner match at Redemption, then we go backstage where McKenzie is with Eli Drake, who says people thought he was down and out after losing the World Title, but now he's the first man in company history to hold tow Feast or Fired briefcases.  Scott Steiner comes in and says that on April 22, we'll be looking at the new World Tag Team Champions.

Josh and Sonjay take us back to Wrestlecon for the original three way match setting up the Redemption main event...

Pentagon Jr vs Fenix vs Austin Aries

Josh and Sonjay inform us that Fenix and Pentagon are brothers.  We start off with the typical lucha spot show, and all three men are down 30 seconds into the match.  Fenix dumps Aries to the floor, and he and Pentagon do more lucha synchronized dancing.  Fenix dumps Pentagon to the floor, but Aries comes in with a missile dropkick for 2.  Aries with a snapmare and second rope elbow to the back of Fenix for 2.  Pentagon is back in and hits a lungblower and goes for covers on both men.  Pentagon drills Aries with a nasty kick to the ribs that sends Aries to the floor, then Fenix hits a rolling Ace Crusher on Pentagon.  Aries in with a series of hard chops on Fenix, wipes Pentagon out with a heat seeking missile to the floor, and that just encourages Fenix to hit a flippy twisty something that wipes out both opponents on the floor.  More spotspotspotspotspotspotspotspot, Fenix screws up half of them, Aries gives Pentagon a neckbreaker over the middle rope, and he comes off the top with the 450 splash, but Pentagon kicks out.  Aries goes right into the Last Chancery, but Fenix breaks it right up as we go to commercial.

We're back, and still trading spots.  It's mostly Los Hermanos De Lucha working Aries over with double team moves until they can't agree on who beats Aries, and they wind up turning on each other.  AAries gets in the middle of it and dishes out chops on both men, but he eats a double superkick and rolls to the floor.  Now that they're left alone, Pentagon hits a backdrop into a powerbomb (!!!!!), then a Here It Is Driver on Fenix for the win.

Winner: Pentagon Jr

That backdrop into the powerbomb was the damndest thing I think I've ever seen.  Picture the Kevin Owens pop up powerbomb, but with Fenix doing a full forward flip while in the air.  Other than that, this was a total "seen one, seen them all" lucha spotfest.

We get a final video package wrapping up all the feuds leading into this weekend's PPV, and then we call it a night.